I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months
So my parents just found out about my fourteen year old brother smoking weed because they found this on his window ledge. So in the middle of a huge lecture my dad decides to open the Baggie and smell it to see how strong it is. He immediately starts crying with laughter. THIS NIGGA HAS BEEN BUYING AND SMOKING FUCKING OREGANO. FUCKIN ITALIAN HERBS. SON. I CAN’T. I CANNOT. I CAN’T DO THIS.
This isn’t funny. That’s the gateway drug to a full blown marinara addiction. It’s good this was caught before this kid started hanging out at Olive Garden and sucking on every breadstick he can find to score another hit.
did she get a haircut
do yoU EVER JUST GET LIKE SOOOOOOOO AFFECTIONATE ABOUT A PERSON LIKE WOW YOU LOVE THEM IMPOSSIBLY AND ITS JUST LIKE WHOA. WHOA YOU’RE ABOUT TO EXPLODE AND YOU GOTTA TELL THEM ABOUT AND MAYBE SING ABOUT IT AND DO A DANCE NUMBER ABOUT IT AND CLIMB ALL OVER THEM WITH AFFECTION
ladies. be careful when u wear spaghetti straps. it might distract the boys. they’ll start thinking of spaghetti. they will get hungry. they will stop at nothing to get their spaghetti.
au where gatsby and nick get married and gatsby’s vows are all addressed to old sport and when the preacher asks if he takes nicholas carraway to be his lawfully wedded husband, gatsby just stands there in confusion for a few minutes and eventually confesses that he has no idea who nicholas carraway is he’s here to marry old sport